What have you been doing all day?!

By 8/24/2015

It's a question put forward by every working father to the new stay at home mother, or vice versa. While they've been beating the books and commuting and staring down a spreadsheet, you've been home taking care of the little bundle of joy and avoiding doing household chores.

Now I will put it out now, I am sat writing this while a pile of washing up sits just conveniently outside my field of vision and a pile of laundry sits at my feet.

I'm not lazy. I'm not avoiding it all on purpose; the fact is Isla has finally gone down for her nap and while I should take advantage of this free time to battle the grime around the taps or sort socks into pairs, my head is screaming to sit down and do nothing.

Looking at it from Jack's point of view, I don't really do as much as I should or could- What have you been doing all day?! he cries as he has to spend precious post-work relaxation time de-cluttering the sofa just to sit down on it.

I tell him how hard the day has been- little Isla puked, then pooped, then puked while I was cleaning the poop..then she did something funny with her toy so I spent half an hour trying to get her to repeat it for the camera...then of course I had to feed her a million times and then wash the bottles and then she puked again and I'm lucky if either myself or her are dressed by 3pm.

(Odd, he says, isn't it; how well behaved and easy she is on the weekends...!)

I've been trying to step it up. I am a home-maker and a responsible adult now and I can't rely on threats and groundings to get my chores done... (not that that ever worked when I lived with my parents either).

The truth behind it all isn't a lack of sleep or that Isla is difficult. It's that I haven't had a whole 24 hours of me time for months and when she goes to sleep I try to de-frazzle. I constantly need to be thinking ahead of time for what she might need or want or what needs doing and by the time she's asleep for 45 minutes I'd rather sit and play Candy Crush than clean toilets.

I'm definitely going to be trying so much harder to keep this house clean! I'll be wiping plates and wiping bums with my eyes closed whilst a cake bakes in the oven before you know it.

(Or I'll at least make sure Jack has some pairs of socks ready for work...)

How did you find being a stay at home mum? I can't be the only one who hates chores!

Steph xo

Twinkly Tuesday
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  1. Oh my goodness, I'm sure your husband is a wonderful man and he is not saying it in a mean way, but tell him to shut up! ;) If you can keep both of you alive all day you are doing your job. Cleaning is my least favorite part of being a mother/homemaker- I have basically figured out the bare minimum that I need to do and I stick with that most of the time. You'll get into a groove eventually, but right now? Take care of Baby and get some help with everything else. You're right, it's completely exhausting thinking about the baby's needs and cleaning up all of the bodily excretions! #twinklytuesday

    1. Ha he's lovely. He doesn't really moan and he's always on board for cooking me dinner every night so I can't complain :p I could get the stuff done and still have time to do my own thing but I'm the queen of procrastinators. x

  2. Yeah I'm the worlds worse SAHM, between blogging and working and you know, just doing anything other than housework, there really isn't a great deal of time for washing and cleaning toilets!

    1. Exactly! I get all motivated to do something but I get so distracted by things that aren't really essential. I was always a procrastinator when I was a teenager as well. Poor Jack :D xx

  3. You're absolutely right that you do definitely need some down-time, and it shouldn't be restricted to nap-time! Getting a sitter is tough and often expensive, but I know several friends whose partners stay home with the kids one night per week so the stay-at-home parent can get out of the house and just let their brain stop whirring for a few moments. They say it's really, really important to have that island of time to yourself.
    And really, really don't beat yourself up about housework. It's the lowest thing on the list and if you're still in the puke-and-poop phase, it's the thing you just let slide. Your partner can always buy a few new pairs of socks like mine did!
    Big hugs !

  4. Haha, this post made me chuckle. I work from home so I have a bit of an excuse, also my toddlers stopped napping, argg!! Seriously enjoy nao times whilst you still have them!
    Becky xx

  5. I was only a stay at home mum during maternity leave but I was rubbish at it too! I always say that the house would be lovely if I was a sahm but the reality would probably be completely different haha! Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday

  6. We do have a right to some time to ourselves as SAHM and babies are pretty intensive when there is only one person. Housework has to be the lowest priority.

    I think that all parents should spend the odd entire day on their own with their children so that they realise how little work obviously gets done.